A Hopefully Humorous Hipster Dating Advice Column

What is the Perfect Hipster First and A Half Date?

If you’re a hipster, you don’t need me to explain that a first and a half date is, essentially, the first date after you hopefully, drunkenly, made out with rather than slept with, a stranger you met in a bar, at a concert, or on the L train.  

I didn’t mention the G train because the L train is so way classier then the G.  When hipsters tell their friends the gushing pre-third date break-up story they automatically lie and say they met their new beloved on the L.

Dates, like locavore foodie pop-up tastings, are seasonal.  Summer’s passing removes the potential for an organic beef Asiadog topped with kimchi and seaweed flakes with a spicy ginger pink guava natural slush at Smorgasburg before a ride on New York Water Taxi, to see the Floating Kabarette at Galapagos Art Space.  

However, with the advent of Nighthawk Cinema, you can enjoy The Mavis Gary, a Maker’s Mark shot and Diet Coke back while munching on parmesan reggiano, black pepper, garlic butter popcorn, housemade pickles, tater tots with queso and scallions, and homemade jerky with lime leaf, Thai chili and ginger during a screening of Diablo Cody’s depiction of your typical teen writer, Young Adult.

And don’t forget, every three-night stand has the potential to transform into a relationship.  Bestow up her, or him, a romantic gift on Valentine’s Day of I Hate Perfume’s 2 ML Travel Size with the scent of Burning Leaves, and you could end up with a “keep the romance alive” Artisanal Locavore whiskey and pickle juice pairing at the woman owned Oenology Winery followed by a V-Day Sewing Party to sew your beloveds own panties or boxers at Shag.

Please submit your #Hipster_Dating_Questions by following @alicewooster on twitter and send her a direct message.

Alice Wooster is a Stand Up Comedian and Writer.  She produces and hosts the We Are Not Hipsters Comedy Show in the Secret Theater of the Legion Bar on Saturday Nights at 6:00.  The next two shows are Jan. 7 and 14, and they are free.

You can view her previously posted youtube video at:


© Alice Wooster, 2011

Tag Brum
Tag Brum
Tag Brum lives in Brooklyn and writes things from a computer whenever wi-fi is available. You can follow him on Twitter @tagbrum.


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