What I like about this question is how specific it is. Which means two things: this person is at the coffee shop on the line to ask for a mocha mecha light brown fore skin milk latte, as we speak, waiting for us to come up with a good line for him/her to hit on his/her server. And, as usual, this person is obviously a stalker.
Now wait just a second, just because you’re a stalker, it doesn’t mean I’m not gonna help you. I have a heart and I need to fill it with hope, hope that you’re gonna get caught and send me an e-mail telling me how it didn’t work and how I’m stupid for giving advice on how to hit on your coffee shop waitress. Now, then, I had my share of coffee shop waitresses and let me tell you, they do taste like coffee! Nah, I’m just kidding.
So, OK, let’s focus on the issue here: Hit. On. Waitress. Oh, I’m sorry. Hit. On. Coffe. Shop. Waitress. She sounds lovely, by the way. I think you guys are gonna be wonderful together.
What you’re gonna need to pull this off is the following:
- Large sack
- Fedora hat
- Fake mustache
- Leather gloves
- Fake passport
- Leather briefcase
After gathering your “hit on coffee shop waitress” pack, you can go to the nearest coffee shop of your choice.